All You Need to Know About all Naija Babes(All Tribes)

I found This hilarious article On the internet, can't help but to share with you'll! 

Read Below: 
Igbo Girls: There must be plenty money, and less or no s*x. She abandons you immediately a rich suitor comes calling. Importer & Exporter Thinz!


Edo Girls: Will love and take care of you with her money, hoping one day you will travel overseas and be rich. After 2 years, and no plan is forth coming, she will dump your sorry ass. Oh, I forgot.....lots of s*x will be involved.


Yoruba Girls: They love with their body, soul and heart. Whether you are rich or poor, that's not their business. They will continue to support you even though you aint making progress. If a suitor comes around, majority will reject him and stick with you. Money is not their problem, but Love. Oh, plenty of s*x is guaranteed (well not all of them will give you.

Tiv Girl: Oh my God. From the first day of the relationship, be preparing for a breakup. If you don't drink, smoke or club.....you are a loser. They won't deny you of s*x, but don't deny them money.....unless you wanna share your girlfriend with a Politician (SugarDaddy). If you are lucky, some may love you.


Idoma Girls: They are widely known as heartbreakers. Oh, you must prove your love 100% to them and expect little love from them. They love and hate s*x, depending on the one you chose.You must also have money, but that's not a solid criteria. Lest I forget, be prepared to be used as an "Emotional Balancer".


Hausa/Kanuiri/Fulani Girls: Chai, They will start discussing marriage from the first week of the relationship. They love so foolishly, that they can sacrifice their comforts for you. 
They don't need your money, most of them have rich parents and relatives. They want to have you as their King, while you treat them as Queens. S*x is not a problem.

Igala Girls: Money and Love goes hand in glove. They love for real, but you must have money. They tend to associate themselves with your everyday life. They give limited s*x. 


Nupe Girls: They are very Shy, lovely and caring. They don't know if money is existing, but am not sure if you will have s*x as you desire. They are sometimes called "wife materials" 


Ikwerre Girls: Na wa ooo, Money is number one on their Agendas. With money by your side, you will experience the kind of love you only dream of. I must warn you, there is a high probability you will lose your girlfriend at any given time. They are naturally attracted to the so called "Highest bidders". Unlike the Igbo girls, they give s*x freely provided money is flowing freely.

Urhobo/Ijaw/Isoko/Itsekiri Girls: hmmmmm, They are possessive and jealous. They love for real, even if you have little money. They have this belief "money will come". They are vulnerable to "common law marriage".....a marriage where a man and a woman lives together because she had an unwanted pregnancy. S*x is not a problem, as long as you are faithful. 

Calabar/Ogoja Girls: Chai chai, s*x from the first day of the relationship is highly guaranteed. They present themselves as slaves to you, they derive joys in seeing their boyfriends getting satisfied s*xually and "FooDilly". Popular opinion thinks these people don't like money, but I betyou....there is time when money will be an issue.

Shocking revelation on BH & Sambisa camps holding abducted girls

Here's an article I found on Abusidiqu.com written by By Dr. Peregrino Brimah. You guys need to read this. Find it below...

Nigerians and the world must know what the true situation in Sambisa and other forests in Borno is. It was in the media that the families who ventured in pursuit of their daughters turned back when they approached the terrorist camps. The media reported that what they saw, was “serious,” but they will not say it for security concerns. We are obligated to reveal what they saw. Continue...

Inside Sambisa Game Reserve
From the credible participants we spoke to, the camps are real and live. The civilians actually reached the Boko Haram camps in Sambisa four days ago. The mission was led by the army division in Borno, who were in the front, while the civilians followed behind.
Upon reaching the periphery of the camp and realizing the threat they faced, the civilians were advised to turn back. When they asked if the military would engage the terrorists, the army commanders responded, “we were given no such directive.”

Boko Haram camps in Sambisa are not hidden. The terrorists camp in clear sight. The camp seen housed thousands of terrorists and their abducted families, up to 3000 people by conservative estimates. The terrorists were seen walking freely in the camps, living a very normal life. Women were seen in the camps, these included the hundreds of women who have been abducted over the years.

The camps were kitted with generators delivering power to their devices. There were fridges, welding machines and all other household and technical equipments.
Over 100 trampoline tents were seen, in which the terrorists dwell. It is not yet rainy season in Borno, so not much shelter is yet utilized.

We were informed that over 50 vehicles were seen in the Sambisa camp. There were hundreds to thousands of motorcycles.

After the civilians turned back and returned to the metropolis, it was related that the army too came back, evidently having not engaged Boko Haram in any physical way. For them it was just another day, another month in another year, scouting the Boko Haram ‘barracks.’ The situation s the same in other forests like Banki and Buniyadi, according to the credible people we spoke to.

The Desperate State Of Insecurity
With the above registered, the world must recognize that there is evidently a standing accord between Boko Haram and the Nigerian military. The military knows and has always known where they hide in plain sight, but is either not equipped, or not interested in ending their reign of terror.

A recent media report in the Vanguard described how a US-based StrategyPage report presented that Boko Haram terrorists were so wealthy; they had actually bought government and security officials over. The source of Boko Haram funding has never been exposed to the people. The Nigerian government continues to cover this up, protecting the sponsors; thus the four year long reign of unlimited sponsored terror with absolute impunity is far from its end. Like the government, Boko Haram thrives on the explosive state of corruption.

Boko Haram invests way more than Nigeria does in equipping and boosting the morale of its army. Boko Haram is today an institution and a well functioning one that pays top dollar to purchase tentacles at all levels of society. Fear and corruption facilitate its growth in this regard. In contrast, the Nigerian government sabotages its army and underfunds and under-equips them. A latest report by the BBC revealed that Boko Haram pays $3000 to purchase mercenary recruits from neighboring countries like Niger. Increasingly perplexed by the course of the war, Nigerian soldiers have been deserting the army according to several reports and military sources. They are frustrated as they realize there is no honest intention to combat the terrorists whose locations are known and are left to operate freely. Soldiers are approaching activists to volunteer their services in a true battle they believe in, after they leave the Nigerian army.

Nigeria is in trouble! We the people know and realize that this situation must be checked in Yar’Adua style—eliminated in totality. Boko Haram must be starved to desperation in their camps and the terrorists must be engaged and killed without remorse. A similar conflict between Nigeria and Chad in the 80’s had the Nigerian army under then Brigadier Muhammadu Buhari, with the 21st Armored Brigade, cut supplies and starve the Habre Chadian troops, thus retaking the 19 Nigerian islands. The efficiency of the Nigerian army is also fondly recollected in its commanding role in solving the Liberian crises. But today, our army cannot capture Sambisa. They are not engaging Boko Haram with any determination to win by any method whatsoever, under whatever directives they have from Abuja; and now it is way passed time we the people do this for ourselves. We simply have no other choice.

Furthermore, our reliable suppositions were again confirmed today with the arrest of some of the “unknown 100 gunmen,” usually reported as “Fulani herdsmen” who have been ravaging the middle belt since 2012; these men confessed according to the DHQ, to being part of Boko Haram. We have analyzed their mission and operations which have involved the massacre of towns and burning all in sight, as being coincident with the mission of Boko Haram: ultimate goal, the destruction of life in large parts of north Nigeria. If further studied, these “100 men” not only dressed and killed and destroyed just like Boko Haram; but also started off provoking ethnic crises, first attacking “Christians,” and when this failed, they as with the primary Boko Haram now moved to the full massacre of all towns, irrespective of creed or ethnicity. The gunmen arrested and displayed looked anything but Fulani; supporting this realization, in times past, some killed marauders have been described as foreign mercenaries. The chronic misinformation on the mission and identities of these marauders and failure of the government to accost them for a whole three years, suggests a sinister, pervasive plan to purposely provoke deadly ethnic tensions in Nigeria.

Trust Breakdown: The State Security Department Takes To Lying
Nigeria’s military and security department has taken to lying to cover their wrong actions or inaction. They lied about the number of girls abducted. They made up an imaginary number they claimed they had freed. They lie about how many are killed and how many they kill in millions. The most recent lie was made by the junior minister of defense, Musiliu Obanikoro who said so on Channels TV, Monday, that no helicopters were used to supply terrorists. This is a categorical lie. We have confirmed from numerous sources including released abductees, who described how choppers flew in to the camps and dropped Mr. Biggs snacks, chicken, burgers and things, bought from the Borno metropolis. There is no doubt as to the accuracy of this information.

Apparently there is cooperation with the military and treacherous military cover-up. We the people must act and time is running out. Soon Boko Haram will be too big to contain and then they can over throw not just the north, but the entire nation as has happened and been attempted by terrorists in neighboring nations and across the world. The time to act is now.

It has been four years that this terror has been going on unchecked and distressingly, increasing in amplitude by the day. The bombing of Nyanya was reviewed by Brian Michael Jenkins and Bruce R. Butterworth, the terrorism experts from the Mineta Transportation Institute (MTI), as being the fifth worst episode of such explosives attack in any nation across the entire world since 1970! The abduction of 234 girls is another topper on the list of few similar abductions in recent world history. The president of Nigeria flew in his hoards of private jets first to Ibadan for a birthday party, then to Kano to dance at a pre-legally permitted campaign rally within a day of the attacks, in a show of disconnect from the terror situation and possible uncanny delight. The incompetence and lack of interest of our current administration in handling this epic crises is not debated and not a today topic. The current reality necessitates the response and active action of the people before all hope is lost along with the lives and limbs being blown away.

Self Help: Embarking on Urgent Civilian Intervention
We are recruiting all support, supplies and volunteers to surround and eliminate Boko Haram in their forest camps. This is a dangerous task, but the Almighty will give us the strength and victory against these enemies of the state, of peace, of man and God.

Time is of the essence. We do not know what these 200 girls are going through, the type of horrific molestation in the hands of these beasts. *God forbid! And not only them, so many of our fellow citizens, mothers, sisters, daughters, brothers, fathers and sons have been trapped with the terrorists for years. It is time for us to do for them what we would want them to do for us, had it been us in the camps or our daughters there.

The parents have vowed to dare again into the forests to rescue their wards. By God’s grace, many of us will go with them. We will also assist them with all the supplies they may need.

We Need Everybody
We invite a homogeneous response from Muslims, Christians and others alike. The Doctor Amadi (JP), Muslims Against Terror organization, who are deeply involved in this rescue mission, it can be recollected played a vital role in reversing a Boko Haram trend of bombing Churches in 2012 when they released the Communiqué captioned, “Official Communiqué from Muslims Against Terror, Nigeria: Fear None Save Allah. Defend Islam, Defend People, Defend Churches, Defend our Nation.” Many of us read this strong message, and supported by calls of the same from Sheikh Gumi as relayed on SaharaReporters, Boko Haram left Churches alone and declared Muslims their new top enemy; they have since killed numerous Muslim scholars. We are all in this together. See MuslimsAgainstTerror The more we come together, the more frustrated Boko Haram and their evil sponsors become.

Nigeria’s billionaires who exclusively benefit from the corrupt failed system, and whose ill-gotten wealth sponsors our unique terror crises which we now export to neighboring nations and around the world, are nowhere to be found now that we need urgent action and contributions. We the ordinary people have only ourselves. All prayers and all forms of contributions to the desperate people and their urgent missions in Borno go a long way and are urgently needed. Emergencies like this are never planned for or expected. The mothers plan to go back into the forests soon and we hope we will be there with them.

It is touching how many of our youth have decided to volunteer in this divine mission against the terrorists. It is simply humbling. It says a lot about the true purity of spirit and faith of Nigerians, when seen through the murky layers of cabal instituted corruption. These young men setting out for Borno will also need our support for their sustenance in this altruistic mission.
Thank you everyone. We will win against Boko Haram and we will win against the persecution of tyrant, usurper cabal who keep us in this compromised, denuded, betrayed, painful state of existence.

Dr. Peregrino Brimah
http://ENDS.ng [Every Nigerian Do Something]
Email: drbrimah@ends.ng Twitter: @EveryNigerian

The Big Picture: 10 Common Fashion Mistakes Men Should Totally Stop...

The Big Picture: 10 Common Fashion Mistakes Men Should Totally Stop...: It is no longer the era where men are allowed to wear anything because they are not considered fashion conscious. These days, a man’s ...

10 Common Fashion Mistakes Men Should Totally Stop Making

It is no longer the era where men are allowed to wear anything because they are not considered fashion conscious. These days, a man’s dressing says a lot about him. From his hair down to his shoes, everything about him makes an impression. Even if you don’t fancy following the fashion trend that much, save us the heartache or eyeache by avoiding these ten fashion blunders:

1. Walking Advertisement: it is cool that you love to deal in labels and the expensive stuff but wearing all these things at once is not cool at all. It is plain juvenile, not meant for adults at all. Just imagine wearing a label like Ed Hardy with very colourful designs; you are wearing the cap, the top and heavily chained wrangler jean? You will look like a thug from a cheaply made hollywood movie from the 80s. Shop for quality and not tags.

2. Oversized Clothes: this is a trend from the past we don’t need to be reminded of. Oversized clothes are definitely a big NO NO. Trim, fitted clothes make you look nice even for people on the big side. If you think you are hiding a pot belly inside a really big tee shirt, you will just end up looking bigger than normal.

3. Skin tight clothes: in a competition with your girlfriend? Why the body hugging clothes? You see some guys and you wonder how they breathe with all the skin tight trousers and body hugging tops they are wearing. Fitted is different from skin tight. Do the little man down there a favour and set it free. The fear of prostrate cancer should drum some senses into you.

4. Pairing socks with sandals: you can only do this in secondary school where it is mandatory as part of your uniform. Asides that, you should not be caught wearing socks with sandals. If you are wearing the socks because of cold, you should wear shoes instead as they keep your feet warmer.

5. Wearing the wrong colour of shoes: this is very common especially with coperate wears. Wearing the wrong colour of shoes with your suit makes you look anything but presentable. Pair a black suit with black shoes, grey suits with black or camel shoes, brown suits with brown or camel suits and navy suits with black, tan, camel or oxblood-coloured shoes.

6. Overstuffing your pockets: this is for men that put everything puttable inside their pockets; house keys, office keys, bulky wallets filled with stash of complimentary cards, receipts, cash and atm cards, mobile phones etc. Bulging pockets make you look bigger and unpresentable. You should get a messanger bag that can carry all your neccesities. If you don’t want to carry a bag, wear a blazer with inner pockers. You can distribute your stuff all over without disturbing your sleek look.

7. Running shoes in public? No: running shoes are good for what they are; for sports. There are shoes you can wear with your casual clothes, not your sweaty gym shoes. Sweat makes shoes smell especially when you don’t give them ‘breathing space’. Do not mismatch the colour of your socks. Always match your socks’ colour with your trousers and not your shoes.

8. Short sleeved shirt with a tie is a big No: this is a big eyesore. Ties should always be worn with a long sleeved shirt. You can always roll up the sleeves when you are relaxing. Your tie should end just above the belt buckle and make sure it is positioned well so that it will be at the centre of the buckle. And don’t forget pocket squares are so the in-thing right now, make sure it matches the colour of your tie.

9. Coordination of accesories: the colour of your watch strap, belt and shoes should go hand in hand. Slight tonal difference of the same colour family is allowed depending on the extent of the difference in shades; a little difference in colour shades will do. The same thing goes for the texture and shine of the three.

10. Too much jewellery: except you are a musician and you are shooting your music video, do not wear too much jewelleries at the same time. The ideal man’s jewellery should be his wedding ring, watch and cufflinks. You can wear a bracelet and neck piece but definitely not with your formal wears. Balance the number of pieces you wear at a time.

Secret Spaceplane, Mystery Mission

By Kyle Mizokami | The Daily Beast – Mon, Apr 7, 2014

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  The X-37B sits on the runway of the Vandenberg Air Force Base on Dec. 3, 2010.
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  NASA's Marshall Space Flight Center image shows on-orbit functions for the reusable …

The Air Force’s secret space plane has been up in orbit for nearly 500 days—a space endurance record. But nearly a year and a half into the mission, the Pentagon still won’t say what the X-37B is doing up there, or when it might come back.  

The U.S. Air Force boosted the robotic X-37B atop the nose of an Atlas-5 rocket in December 2012. Since then it’s orbited the Earth thousands of times, overflying such interesting places as North Korea and Iran.  

READ MORE Apps to Get Your Sherlock On

Similar to the Space Shuttle in appearance, the diminutive X-37B is about a quarter the size of the old shuttles. But there are major differences. Lacking a crew, the spacecraft has no cockpit windows. The X-37B has a payload bay about the size of a pickup truck bed.

And while the original Space Shuttle could stay in orbit for up to 17 days—a limitation largely due to the needs of the crew—the first X-37B mission, OTV-1, spent 225 days in space under the guidance of Air Force space flight controllers at Schriever Air Force Base, Colorado. The second mission, OTV-2, handily doubled that number, clocking 469 days in orbit. OTV-3 is currently at 482 days and counting. 

Eventually—nobody knows when—the pudgy space plane will glide back down to Earth like the Space Shuttle it resembles, rolling to a stop on an Air Force runway in California.   

The X-37B began as a NASA project to build a small, unmanned space plane. NASA handed the project over to the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency in 2004, but after budgetary problems the program was transferred to the U.S. Air Force Rapid Capabilities Office, which continues to manage the X-37B program. Boeing’s Phantom Works division built two of the X-37B spacecraft.   

The U.S. Air Force will not comment on what kind of missions the X-37B does in space. The service, which doesn’t mind talking about the space drone as a technological achievement, clams up when discussing actual missions.  

Rumors abound. One of the most popular is the X-37B can sneak up and eavesdrop on other satellites. The idea does have appeal, but skeptics point out the U.S. already has other smaller, harder to track satellites to do just that.  

Another rumor is that the X-37B can, like supervillian Ernst Blofeld’s giant clamshell satellite in You Only Live Twice, saddle up to the satellites of other nations and mess with them. Though theoretically possible, the X-37 would have to be launched into an orbit similar to the target’s, and the X-37B’s size makes it easy to track. Even amateur satellite spotters can track the X-37B, and it would be obvious to everyone who had stolen a satellite.   

The most interesting—but least likely—rumor is that the X-37B is some kind of orbital bomber, capable of nailing targets from on high. There’s not a whole lot of evidence to back that theory up.  

Brian Weeden, a former Air Force officer with the Space Command’s Joint Space Operations Center and now at the Secure World Foundation, believes that the X-37B is primarily a test bed for new technologies. “I think it is primarily an ISR (Intelligence, Surveillance and Reconnaissance) platform for testing new sensor technologies or validating new technologies.” Weeden tells The Daily Beast. “The current OTV-3 on orbit has basically been in the same orbit since launch, with only the occasional maneuver to maintain that orbit. That’s consistent with a remote sensing/ISR mission.” 

The X-37B is probably testing technologies that might be incorporated into the spy satellites of the future. New cameras, radars, and other sensors could be tested in space and then brought back to Earth for study. That’s much better than designing them on Earth and then building an enormously expensive spy satellite reliant on untested technology.  

That doesn’t mean that OTV-3 isn’t spying on other countries—it probably is. OTV-3’s orbit takes it over all sorts of interesting places, including North Korea, Iran, Pakistan, Afghanistan, and China. The space drone’s sensors are likely could well be getting workouts against real-world targets, from North Korean missile facilities to shipyards where China’s next aircraft carriers are being built.  

And although it’s only a guess, one can surmise that, based on the amount of time the X-37B is spending in orbit, those sensors are apparently working pretty well.  

If the X-37B is just a test platform, why won’t the Pentagon open up about it? “I don’t think the secrecy surrounding the X-37B program is an attempt by the U.S. government to hide anything nefarious, but rather that it’s driven by bureaucratic inertia,” Weeden says. Addressing the rumors, Weeden points out, “The secrecy surrounding the program makes it difficult for the U.S. government to respond meaningfully to those claims and debunk them.” 

The X-37B is a relatively bright spot during a fallow period for the U.S. space program, and Boeing and the Air Force are capitalizing on the program’s success. Boeing is converting the former Orbiter Processing Facility at the Kennedy Space Center, where Space Shuttles were maintained in-between spaceflights, to a one-stop facility designed to refurbish landed X-37Bs and prepare them for spaceflight again. 

Boeing has also proposed a larger X-37C, which would be capable of carrying up to six astronauts to and from orbit. This project is likely to get a second look as relations with Russia, the only country currently capable of sending astronauts into space, sour over the situation in the Ukraine.  

In the meantime OTV-3 continues to drift overhead, silently orbiting the Earth, doing whatever it does. It’s anyone’s guess when it will be coming back.

Related from The Daily Beast

Beyond The Vagina: What be This Creature Called Woman?

What Be This Creature Called Woman?

The above is a million dollar question and not even the men of old have found the correct answer. Women too, have failed. But men through the ages, in their life’s journeys have discovered a response to the subject in question and therein, also, rested the solution to many of their problems. To them, a woman is that which is made up of three parts:Vagina, Breast (backside inclusive) and hips and all the other parts can be summed up in some way into the three.

It is amazing how a man can live with or be around women and be totally oblivious about the female anatomy. How many times have I heard guys say, “You women have issues. I am so glad I’m a man!” And somehow you people think we’re sad because we’re female and bleed from our lady parts every month? Okay, yeah, I admit that we do have issues but it all comes with the packaging and we have learnt to accept ourselves the way we are and are dealing with our ‘peculiarities’ well enough. But what we don’t need is the sons of Adam making it difficult for us when they can easily try to understand that we are a little bit more complicated than they are. They say men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Well, I have neither been to Mars nor Venus but I can tell you that men are like that simple and straight 100meter race that begins at a point and ends at another. While women are as complex as a game of football—twenty-two players on the field, a referee and linesmen breathing down your neck, a ball that just won’t stay in one place, two goal posts, a field full of grass that stretches out forever and all the madness of running round and trying to make a score. Get the picture now?

Okay, I know you still don’t. So let me help you.

WOMEN ARE HORMONAL

We produce estrogen, progesterone, testosterone and other hormones all the freaking time. Yes, I said testosterone. It doesn’t belong to you guys alone, though we can’t compete with you in that department. But all the other hormones affect our bodies and our brains and to some extent (depending on the individual) affect our moods also. I had to put this down first so you would understand where I’m going to next as I concentrate on the female and her body.

THERE IS A PATTERN

Based on her hormonal alterations, a woman has mood changes that make her want certain things at different times of the month. If a man is able to read these changes carefully, he would see that her sensitivity, sensuality, energy, emotions and logic have their moments and he would learn to enjoy the many different faces she presents to him. Like most female animals, women have a time in their cycle when they are most fertile and have strong sexual urges. I think the term for it is ‘heat’. It usually comes about ten days after their menstruation begins when there is a surge in estrogen and testosterone. Then, a week after that, an increase in progesterone (the nurturing hormone) would make a woman prefer cuddling to sex. She is more relaxed at this moment and she just wants to stay in and have her man hold her while she watches a movie or while they talk. When this progesterone level drops days after, she becomes irritated by little things, she’s also weepy and temperamental and it is at this point that PMS sets in. Shortly after that, just a day before her period starts again, her bad mood reaches a high and may drop considerably or remain in that state until the period ends.

DON’T JOKE WITH THE PMS

It is not an act we put up to piss people around us off. It is called Premenstrual Syndrome, defined as the physical and or psychological symptoms women go through just days before their period comes. To some women, it is no biggy as their symptoms are mild but for others, it is a terrible time. They get bloated, become irritable, have mood swings, are short tempered, become clumsy, have weight gain, are fatigued, suffer migraines, tender breasts, become antagonistic and very bitchy. Brothers are warned not to press the wrong buttons during this time.

WOMEN NEED FOREPLAY

Now, having read the above, you should be smart enough to conclude that the female body is not always tuned up like the male’s. She is not always in the mood to go all the way. Ever heard the phrase “I just want to cuddle”? She’s not pushing you away. She just wants to cuddle. But if you’re smart and sensitive enough to understand ‘womanspeak’, you would know that she just told you, “you don’t expect me to just let you in like that. I need more from you because I’m in a very mushy mood.” Foreplay does not only prepare her physically but psychologically too, and with women, they need both to go all the way.

OUCH! THAT HURTS

Boobs! Boobs! Boobs! Ooooh…more boobs! That’s how you guys see it but to us, they are sensitive body parts. I would never understand men’s fascination with the female mammary glands but I guess that’s the way God intended. However, I wish He had sent down a user manual. And it should be something like this: Fragile. Sensitive. Handle with care. Flattens with time. Do not wring. Do not try to pluck out from base. Do not chew. Leave some for the next generation.

SHE IS WITH CHILD, DARN IT!

So many things happen to a woman during pregnancy. There is an increase in hormones and a decrease in brain size. Yes, you better believe that. But it doesn’t mean she becomes dumber; and have no fears, it returns back to normal after the baby is born. However during the nine months, she goes through a lot of emotional, psychological and physical alterations and they can make her go really crazy. Some women have a pretty normal pregnancy but ‘normal’ should be taken with a pinch of salt here. It is a crazy time for women and they need support from the men in their lives.

THE SIXTH SENSE

I kid you not, women do have it and it is called Intuition. Maybe it’s because we are more in touch with our feelings and are sensitive about the world around us that we tend to see things men often overlook, and with time, we form a pattern in our brains that enable us predict the future or sense that something is off. Now, the thing about this intuition phenomenon is that it doesn’t turn us into seers or prophets; it is basically a complex brain work and can be honed with the power of observation. However, some people believe it is spiritual and a special gift from God to women because we are supposed to be nurturers by nature. Whatever it is, whenever your woman tells you she senses something, give her an ear. It could be her sixth sense at work.

NOT ALL WOMEN PMS

Like all of God’s creations that are different in their own ways, He made women differ from each other too. PMS is something some lucky women have never experienced before. And oh, I envy them. That being said, those women are still women and when they are pissed off or burst into unnecessary tears, they expect their men to understand that they’re just having an emotional moment and need a shoulder to cry on. They don’t need being asked, “are you PMSing or are you on your period?” Yes, that is so infuriating! Even for those of us who have PMS issues. Our menstrual cycle does not control us. We can be as logical and straight thinking as you can be.

WEIGHT ISSUES

Of course, we do have those. Even if we go to the gym everyday and come out looking like Beyonce, we still feel one or two places need a little more slimming, so it doesn’t help when you notice our little love handles and have something smart to say about them. We are beautiful creatures and that is all we need to be told. We already have each other to make us feel fat and ugly.

YOU’RE NOT THE MAN

I am going to stab my ladies in the back with this one and I hope they forgive me. What I want to share is one of women’s best kept secrets and it has worked well for us because men are a very clueless species. According to studies, only 30% of women orgasm during sex. Shocked? So what about the other 70%? Are they faking it? Probably. But as a guy, you’re sure you felt her clench really hard and moan out, right? And you were there thinking she came and you did pat yourself on the back for a job well done. *shaking my head slowly at you with a sad smile*. She used the age-old trick of clenching her Kegel muscles to give you the feel of an actual orgasm. She probably didn’t make it there. But don’t’ feel bad. That may be how she is wired. Not all women get there by the real act. There is that little button called the clitoris that has 8,000 nerve endings connected with 15, 000 nerve fibers and it reigns supreme in the land of the V. Find out what percentage your woman belongs to and discover what works better for her by asking her and taking time with foreplay. You didn’t create sex and neither did the sex movie industry. Make your rules, enjoy it and you’ll be the man!

Phew! Finally, I got through this  in one piece. This is a little out of my style (writing non-fiction about my gender, I mean) but I’m glad I did it.

In conclusion, I just want to add this last secret and it applies to every woman irrespective of her hormonal background. We just want to be respected and loved just like you do. Okay, maybe a little more. And we love lots of attention. And chocolate. And a littlepresent once in a while. Add this to whatever drama that comes along with the territory and you have the complete feminine package. It is as simple as that!

So, back to the question: what be this creature called woman? I have no idea still. I’m just as clueless as you are.